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I am a voracious traveller and have had the good fortune of visiting at least forty to fifty cities across continents in the last two decades. Travel energizes me, as I am a curious and happy traveller always looking out for the new, the un-discovered and the ‘positive’ in every place I visit. Whether it is Naukuchiatal or New York, Periyar or Paris, Delhi or Denmark, I have enjoyed and celebrated each of my travels with equal zest, always discovering something ‘special’ that is unique & exquisite about the place. And it’s never been about the facilities or the comforts, as much as it is about the energy and attitude of the place and it’s people.
So for someone like me, an opportunity to officially visit Lahore came like a blessing in disguise, as Pakistan is one country that would otherwise never come up as a tourist destination for most Indians. I was in Lahore to speak at the prestigious Women Leadership Forum organized by Nutshell & AIMA. I was delighted at the thought of visiting our closest neighbor and the birthplace of my parents.
I had grown up hearing many stories from them about the large houses, the warmth, the camaraderie and the good life they lived before the lines of geography came in the way of humankind. My Mom says her father owned a cinema hall in her name called “Lakshmi” in a small town of Dadu and my Mom-in-Law talks about having a badminton court inside their haveli that had twenty two rooms! Stories always ended with a tinge of sadness, ruing the way they had to leave the country overnight like fugitives.
I was excited about finally crossing over the line & meeting our twin neighbor, so similar & yet the constant ‘other’. But I must admit that beneath this excitement lay a lurking nervousness, well aware of the hostility and suspicion exaggerated by the constant images of strife & stress by our politicians & media. What didn’t help matters was the reaction of friends and family, “What? Lahore? Are you sure? Think again!!”
But I was only interested in the human interactions; the relationships beyond the politics & nothing could dissuade me from taking this trip.
And how glad I am!
‘Jine Lahore nai vekhiya, o jameya nai’ (One who hasn’t seen Lahore has not been born). Whoever coined the phrase had obviously experienced the glory of Lahore and so did I.
I experienced the outpouring of warmth and generosity from Pakistanis the moment we reached the Visa Office. Our hosts were personally present to meet the Indian delegates. The curiosity & conversation started the moment we identified ourselves as Indians. While, our papers were being processed, the lights went off and that became a converastion starter and the start of fabulous Pakistani hospitality .
“Do you have electricity problems too? Don’t worry, it won’t take long.. please sit in the Duty Officer’s room, there is a big window there..you’ll feel more comfortable”.
We were offered water& tea and made to feel comfortable.
And this experience repeated itself throughout our three day stay in the city.
As we got in the car to drive towards the Pearl InterContinental hotel, the driver got chatting. I noticed his finesse as a conversationalist. His speech was laced with nuances with many small details & facts. The energy during the interaction was un-deniable. I soon realized that most Pakistanis are great talkers displaying genuine interest in the person they are speaking to and probably that’s what makes their company highly enjoyable. Their conversations about the most everyday topics have so much flavor and if I may use the Hindi word, ‘ras’ in them.
The conference itself was well attended and I was surprised to see at least 35-40% male delegates in a Women’s conference, which was so unlike India. There was an honest attempt in dialogues to address gender related issues across class & creed.
Later in the evening we went for an Atif Aslam musical evening at the “Punjab State University” and this is one experience that sealed my belief that we have to step out of the prism of received opinion and false perceptions. But first the incident.
I am a big Atif fan and one of my Pakistani friends ( by now I had made a few ) insisted on taking me to the front of the stage to shake his hand and experience him up, close & personal. Looking at the sight of hundreds of students going wild infront of the stage I immediately resisted but my friend started cutting me through the crowd with just one phrase “She’s a guest from India, please let her pass”. I was simply amazed at the ease with which the path opened up and we were in the first row within seconds!
That got me wondering “Why hasn’t our media ever captured these emotions? Why do they only cover large events like exchange programmes or music and dance performances or literature festivals that happen once in a while? What about the everyday experiences of people travelling to one another’s country?, I am sure they are enough anecdotes from both sides with people carrying delightful stories of warmth, friendship and their neighbours going the extra mile for them.
“Aap India se hai? (Are you Indian?) That makes you our guest and we’ll serve you is a phrase that stopped to surprise me after some time.
Pakistani goodwill towards Indians seemed to be visible all across and manifested itself in offers, mementoes and many eager conversations about common cultures, Bollywood and of course, cricket.
I can narrate many more experiences but I am sure by now you get a gist of my emotions. I am not trying to give any message, but just saying that there is so much to share, cutting across cultural-historical boundaries, so much to gain by wiping out the lines of divide and hatred & start celebrating rather than denigrating each other because after all we are two sides of the same coin.
